The title sums up everything I feel right now. I have been learning constantly since June of 2007 when I started down this path. Yet I still feel far away from understanding. I came close in my only lab attempt this past October, but losing is never comforting, no matter how close you came to winning. The biggest issue right now is I am starting to feel the burn out setting in. So much reading and labs has been done. So many hours put in, but I still feel far away again. One thing I learned from my studies is never take something you love to do and turn it into something you have to do. It only becomes a chore once you do.

Within the last couple of weeks, whenever I start doing labs, I get to a point where I just toss the lab aside and do something else. A few people have told me I just need a break. Problem is, I took a three month break after my lab attempt and I don’t feel refreshed one bit. Part of me thinks maybe the overall blueprint is overwhelming. Just the addition of MPLS to me in insanity. I know it is not core and not really hard, but that still doesn’t mean it can’t be complicated. I just can’t comprehend anymore how anyone can commit all this information to memory! Maybe I am just burnt out from my material. Maybe I am just bored of the labs. I definitely know I am tired of reading cut and dry information 🙂

Maybe the problem is I am still doing technology focused workbooks. Maybe I need to concentrate more on the full labs again and get away from the same topic for hours on end. I just feel right now my understanding isn’t any greater than before.  I don’t know how to fight against it. I even thought about another track, but I don’t want to quit.  Even my blog posts were more of a technical nature in the past, but now not so much.

I need to find new motivation or just have a good long talk with someone. I think I have been at this alone for so long and maybe that is the issue…